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9 Signs You're Being Gaslighted and What to Do About It

Khushboo Motihar
13 Jul 2022

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a victim's mind, leading them to question their sanity. Despite its prevalence, 3 out of 4 adults in the USA do not know what the term means according to YouGov data. As a victim of gaslighting, it is important to understand the signs so that you can take action to protect yourself, especially because gaslighting is a difficult behaviour to identify. This blog will discuss the nine signs of a person being gaslighted and six things you can do to reclaim your power and happiness. 

Where Did Gaslighting Get its Name?

The term “gaslighting” is derived from the 1944 film Gaslight. A husband tries to convince his wife and everyone around her that she’s going insane by manipulating small elements in their environment, like the gas lights in their home. 

9 Signs of Gaslighting

Gaslighting can take many forms, but there are some common signs to look out for. If you experience any of the following, it may be time to take action - 

1. Making You Question Your Reality

Your partner may deny things that you know to be true, or they will twist your words and experiences so you question your own reality. 

2. Making You Doubt Your Memories

The person who is gaslighting you will often try to convince you that your memories are wrong or certain incidents never occurred.  

3. Minimising or Gaslighting Your Emotions

You will often be made to feel like your emotions are invalid or you are overreacting to situations..Withholding Information From You

The individual will often withhold information from you or give you false information to keep you off balance and guessing. 

5. Isolating You From Your Support System

You will be separated from your family and friends so that you become more reliant on the individual. 

6. Creating a Sense of Dependency

The individual will often try to make you feel like you need them in order to be happy or function properly.7.Threatening

You may be threatened with violence or other forms of harm if you try to leave them or challenge them. 

8. They Never Let You Talk During a Conflict

You will not be allowed to speak during a conflict or will be constantly interrupted. 

9. They Are Dismissive of Your Feelings

The gaslighter will often dismiss your feelings or tell you that you're being too sensitive. You feel like you can't do anything right or you will never be good enough. 

Identifying the signs of gaslighting is the first step in taking back control of your life. Here are six things you can do to take a step toward regaining your power - 

1. Speak Up for Yourself

It is important to assert yourself and not let the gaslighter control you with their words or actions. 

2. Build a Support System

Gaslighting can be a lonely experience. It is essential to reach out to family and friends who will support you and validate your reality.  

3. Document Everything

Keep a journal or diary of the events that are happening. This can be helpful in spotting patterns and also serves as a reminder that you are not overreacting. 

4. Set Boundaries

It is essential to set boundaries with the abuser. This may mean setting limits on communication or ending the relationship entirely.

5. Seek Professional Help

If you are struggling to cope with gaslighting, it is important to seek professional help. A therapist can help you to deal with the emotional trauma and heal from the experience. 

6. Listen to Someone Who Isn't In the Relationship

When you are in a relationship, it can be difficult to see things clearly. Talking to a trusted friend or family member can help you to gain some clarity. 

As a victim of gaslighting, it is important to remember that you are not alone and help is available. Always remember, you are not to blame. With the right support, you can heal and move on to a healthier and happier life.

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